Royal Wedding Day of Shenanigans: Celebrating the Union of Couples and Idiots—A Love Story
I have no idea why the title of this post is so long.
I really love London, and I’m going to miss it very much. It’s a fine town, and I’ve had very rich experiences thanks to it.
I’m pretty sure The Xx is playing at Costa Coffee right now. I can never remember what it is about the mellowy-tense (paradox, ikr?) tune of this particular song that makes me cringe. Then when I remember who it is, it all makes sense. But shouldn’t that be done now?
7AM - Wake up
8AM - Set out with Phyllis, Lars, Jason, Dominik, and his friend Leoni.
8:30 AM - Arrive at Green Park, discover we are blocked from entering Westminster Abbey area
9AM - Slowly make our way to a side street where they shuttle ambulances back and forth in front of Buckingham Palace.
10 - 11:30AM - In a squished crowd, a woman farts on me repeatedly as I try and eat my lunch.
We see the royals. Yay.
At this point, time means nothing. We make our way to Buckingham Palace and get a terrific view of the balcony. Eventually, Kate and William greet the crowd. The other royals join them. They wave and kiss. Yay.
2PM? We meet Carole at a Starbucks on Piccadilly Street. Head to Shoreditch for a street party. After a half-hour to an hour venture, we can’t get in without wristbands.
Dominik finds an unopened bottle of Vitamin Water sitting in the middle of the street. He drinks it.
We hunt for food and drinks. We discover some sort of restaurant/pub. They’re playing Pirates of the Caribbean: The Curse of the Black Pearl on the flatscreen tvs. I fail to handle it cooly.
We discuss many things. A good time is had.
We find another street party. More fun is had.
Lars and Phyllis leave to get work done.
Fun turns to Anger. No more good times are had.
We take the bus home at 10:30PM.
El Fin.
